Clowning Around the United States


What does McDonald’s and terrorizing innocent people have in common? Clowns. Clowns have been sighted across the nation, see this map,  attacking innocent civilians. What was once an irrational childhood fear is now rationalized as videos surface from around the nation of clowns chasing people with weapons.

Upon first hearing about the clowns, junior Sequoya Ake wasn’t too sure they were a real threat.

“At first I thought it was a joke because who dresses up as a clown to do this sort of thing?” Ake said.

Senior David Horowitz had a different opinion on the clowns when he first heard of them.

“There have been many criminal trends that have gained some momentum for a short period of time and phased out, and I thought this was just another such phase. I still do, and I think it’ll [generally] phase out after Halloween,” Horowitz said.

Horowitz said he thinks the clowns are just a trend.

“I think these clowns are correlated to Halloween – the phase was timed perfectly for it. Sure, it started a while ago, but it’s had time to grow up to this point. It’s a creepy phase, both the threatening and non-threatening clowns, but people do crazy things all the time – especially around Halloween,” Horowitz said.

Horowitz isn’t going out on Halloween, but wouldn’t be too concerned if he was and Ake’s plans to go out aren’t being dashed by these clowns.

“The chances of you seeing a clown are pretty slim,” Ake said.

If Ake sees a clown, her plan is to fight it back just enough to be able to get away safely.

“[My advice for people who are scared of the clowns is to] simply stay alert and cautious. Any threat, even if it may not have substance, is enough to warrant caution. I wouldn’t really be scared of these clowns, though. If one is lingering outside your home, let the police handle it. They deal with worse.”